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Cheryl Balcom

Wisdom = Discernment + Restraint

Updated: Jun 18

Truths from Proverbs 27


Just as death and destruction are never satisfied, so human desire is never satisfied.  

Proverbs 27:20 NLT


Have you ever found yourself jumping into a conversation with a solution to a shared problem or struggle, even before your friend has finished her sentence? I have, especially if it concerns a situation I have experienced. I am convinced that I have the wisdom she needs.


Other times, I may see the truth but choose to hold back on any rebuke or exhortation rather than risk hurting her feelings or damaging our friendship.



two women smiling and talking over coffee


Proverbs 27 gets to the root of our troubles in verse 20, saying, “Just as death and destruction are never satisfied, so human desire is never satisfied.” This desire of ours to do or say what we want, when we want, no matter what, goes back to the Garden of Eden. We have an insatiable desire to gratify self first in every circumstance. This means we often speak our minds rashly without forethought. Or, we hold back to protect ourselves from conflict when we really should speak up.


In this chapter of Proverbs, several verses relate to our speech. Wisdom requires restraint, and so we are encouraged not to rashly praise ourselves (v.2), or loudly greet our neighbor in the morning – even cheerfully! (v.14) And don’t let your complaints drip like a leaky roof, there is no edification in that. It’s just plain annoying. (v. 15-16)


The words to our friends should especially be noted in these passages. We are called to sharpen our friends, as iron sharpens iron (v.17); to speak truthfully to those we love, even if it hurts. After all, wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy. (v.6) and heartfelt counsel is as sweet as perfume (v. 9).


Wisdom also requires discernment. Be thoughtful, and prayerful, before acting or speaking. Sometimes holding back allows a situation to play out for the good of all involved. Don’t give words of honey to someone who is already stuffed (v. 7). It’s often worth it to listen a little more and speak a little less. Waiting on the Lord to bring that person to a point of spiritual hunger allows you to then offer a morsel of truth that will be better received.


Words have the power to deliver truth, love, criticism, or outright harm to their recipient. May we heed the wisdom of the Lord, through the writer of Proverbs, and allow our words to be less about ourselves and more for the glory of God and the encouragement of His people.

 

This is an edited version of my post that first appeared on The Round Farmhouse Ministries’ social media pages on August 27, 2023, as part of their summer series on Proverbs.

 

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