Forgiveness

𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘗𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘏𝘪𝘮, “𝘓𝘰𝘳𝘥, 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘰f𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮? 𝘜𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴?” 𝘑𝘦𝘴𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘮, “𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯.” - 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘸 18:21-22

So often have I read this passage from the viewpoint of the religiously superior, with the haughtiness of Peter, once again being required to forgive a lowly sinner. How tiresome to have to forgive someone more than three times! How generous of my gracious and holy self to bestow forgiveness even as much as seven times!

I recently found myself on the opposite end of this situation, however. I was the one needing to ask for forgiveness from the same person, seven times and then some. I watched as he struggled to forgive me yet again; the desire to throw me out into the street, to leave me weeping and gnashing my teeth, was palpable.

And I deserved it.

I privately considered myself humble for seeking forgiveness over the last few weeks for behavior that a teensy-weensy part of me STILL believed was justified. A part of me strongly resisted what felt like groveling, my proud flesh hating every minute of it. By the wisdom of the Holy Spirit, I knew deep in my bones that it was necessary, though the knowledge that I WAS wrong and DID IN FACT need forgiveness grated on every single fiber of my being.

Yet I feared I had reached the limit of forgiveness. Had my rude, defiant behavior permanently changed this relationship, beyond repair?

I woke up this morning with Matthew 18:21-22 running through my head, but this time I realized I had been on the receiving end of seventy times seven.

Not only was I grateful that this sibling in Christ was able to forgive me, even if through clenched teeth, but I was struck once again by the unending forgiveness of my Savior, the seventy-times-seven grace He has for me.

The Almighty, the ever-present God, who heard my James 1:19-20 prayer on the morning commute, heard my cries of wrecked confession on the drive home.

And He forgave me … without clenching His teeth.

𝘖𝘩, 𝘸𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘢𝘮, 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩??

This forgiven sinner says, on this new day of grace,

𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬𝘴 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘎𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘑𝘦𝘴𝘶𝘴 𝘊𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘓𝘰𝘳𝘥!